Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
