I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
We had sex on a dog bed..
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
