Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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