Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did. http://tfl.nu/mi39
  Replies (6) Good night (3579) Bad night (772)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight http://tfl.nu/37pc
  Replies (22) Good night (824) Bad night (2461)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone http://tfl.nu/r2zj
  Replies (37) Good night (4038) Bad night (982)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A http://tfl.nu/1ey6
  Replies (28) Good night (1291) Bad night (5477)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised http://tfl.nu/5ukp
  Replies (10) Good night (4047) Bad night (1460)
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (224): Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little. http://tfl.nu/kc37
  Replies (16) Good night (1880) Bad night (2824)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together. http://tfl.nu/tn1p
  Replies (8) Good night (3007) Bad night (1794)
• Favorite

  (+45): View more from Denmark

  Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+45): Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired. http://tfl.nu/rbaa
  Replies (9) Good night (5244) Bad night (1237)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (252): It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there. http://tfl.nu/94gv
  Replies (17) Good night (1270) Bad night (3541)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer. http://tfl.nu/fsjr
  Replies (4) Good night (2917) Bad night (760)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding." http://tfl.nu/ytsu
  Replies (5) Good night (1867) Bad night (1240)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from. http://tfl.nu/e26m
  Replies (12) Good night (980) Bad night (1121)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here. http://tfl.nu/hoyt
  Replies (8) Good night (1024) Bad night (789)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.

  (1-406): View more from Montana

  Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever. (1-406): Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible. http://tfl.nu/2r6p
  Replies (3) Good night (927) Bad night (567)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown http://tfl.nu/kwyi
  Replies (2) Good night (626) Bad night (388)

Randomize