if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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