can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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