he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
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