"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
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