OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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