Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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