and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
