At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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