Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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