i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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