just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
