You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
