Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
