normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
i wish my penis had a tongue
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Randomize
