what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Never joke about your clitoris.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize