Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize