Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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