i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
