This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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