How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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