I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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