He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
