So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Farmville is her only friend.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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