I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
we made out on top of his cat.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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