wanna go halves on a baby?
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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