Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
