how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
