Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
