I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
