Christians are straight up FREAKS
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
