And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
