Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
