so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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