Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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