Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
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So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
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Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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