Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
