I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
