Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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