We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
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