Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.