Please, let me fuck your mom
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize