She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Randomize
