Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
