I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Randomize
