drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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