I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
