I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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