I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
