she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
