Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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